Helluvablog

I wanted to get back into posting and the habits of talking about me and stuff around me so I thought I’d do one of those wanky questionnaires that people always e-mail you. Came out something like this…

1. What was the last meaningful thing you did?
   Care
2. What was your first love like?
   Painful, embarassing and one-sided
3. What do you wish you could tell your parents?
   anything
4. What is the one thing you would never do, no matter how much money was offered?
   Eat shit and die
5. What are your favorite sounds?
   harmonies. tight female vocal harmonies.
6. How do you “get over someone”?
   a period of hate, a period of acceptance and a new one.
7. Do you like cartoons?
   Who would possibly answer no
8. 8. Have you ever-contemplated suicide?
   Yes. I’ve also contemplated eating cat shit and flying to the moon in a carrier bag.
9. How old were you when you gave/received your first kiss?
   10-11
10. How do you deal with anger?
    1.swear. 2. breathe deeply 3 swear again and hit something. 4.Fix broken thing 5. Shoot germans online.
11. What is your opinion on bisexuality?
    Whatever.
12. In a perfect world, what would you be?
    Immortal
13. How tall are you?
    Dunno – 5’7″ – 5’8″ish
14. Do you ever feel invisible?
    Surely one would look invisible and not feel it.
15. Would you be willing to go on Temptation Island?
    I’m single so… sure :0)
16. Do you keep a journal?
    no
17. What is the most unusual gift you bought for somebody last Christmas?
    A book on Endangered Parrots
18. Why do you fail?
    Who says I fail?
19. Do you write snail mail to anyone or do you mostly email?
    E-mail. Haven’t written a letter in 16+ years
20. How do you feel about pornography?
    It’s mostly shit but it serves a purpose and can be fun.
21. What is heaven like?
    What is Santa Claus like?
22. What do you have on your walls?
    Pictures, a Renoir Print, photos, cymbals, a tambourine, Indian (asian) wall hangings, L-plates, a frisbee, a hat, postcards a grip-strengthener concert tickets, flyers… I’ll stop there
23. What is hell like?
    What is fairyland like?
24. What is the most embarrassing CD in your collection?
    Brandi & Monica “The Boy Is Mine” – you don’t even want to know about my vinyl
25. What is in your fridge right now?
    Stuff. Sauce. Hummous, salsa, milk, pitta bread oj… and porridge oats. Don’t ask why I keep them there, I just do.
26. If you could talk to yourself as a five year old for five seconds, what would you say?
    Learn everything – suck your teachers dry.
27. If Satan appeared to you right now, what would he say?
    “Hello, I’m Satan. And you thought I didn’t exist. MooHAHAHAHAHAH! Fear me.” etc
28. What should people pay more attention to?
    Detail
29. Left handed or right?
    Left, of course.
30. What about you would surprise other people?
    Most stuff. Scratch the surface a bit.
31. What is your favorite poem?
    Scratch’d by a fall, with moans;
    As children of weak age,
    Lend life to dumb stones whereupon to vent their rage.
    And bend their little fists,
    And rate the senseless ground.
32. What is a guilty pleasure you have?
    Pleasure is nothing to be guilty about. I like what I like.
33. What book changed your life?
    Fist-Fucking By Numbers

So, that’s me I suppose.

Busy.

That’s where I’ve been. I’ve been busy working, I’ve been busy having family shit and I’ve been busy having a mini nervous breakdown. Really busy.

Work has been eating my time, leaving little for anything else – a cascade of video projects with barely realistic deadlines, a website, an interactive CD-ROM and an electronic handbook.

I’ve had a bit of a social prolapse and my constant yeehaww lifestyle has come to an abrupt halt. Other than work, I’ve been out of the house twice in the last two months – even doing my shopping online – this Howard Hughes period is coming to an end now though. The only contact I’ve had with other people has been by phone, e-mail and Teamspeak. Been playing a lot of the BAFTA-winning Call of Duty online. I have even hired a dedicated server (along with five friends) and we now have up to 24 people at a time shooting each other’s faces off. At the moment I am trying to learn Regular Expressions so that I can administer the server properly – but that’s another story. I have a new housemate and a stoooopid dog – neither of which I ever seem to see, I’m older, fatter and more sober than I was. Two of these things will change in the future. One will continue. See if you can guess which.

Anyway, suffice to say that sorry it’s been a while, but I’m back and hope to get back to the original flavour of the Helluva Blog.

Happy New Year. Here’s hoping that 2004 is better than 2003.

Well? SXC is back online! Go on, RUN.

Starting to feel like a local sports hall after an earthquake here…

Hello you poor, forlorn SXCers. Don’t look so lost. You’re amongst friends. There is a place you can go and get all that posting off your chest – just until SXC comes back online. It’s called the Helluva Forum and you might find that there are more familiar ‘faces’ there than you’d expect…

Come on in, have a cup of tea and a chat, relax. Everything will be fine…

So… tonight I went out, as I’ve been planning to do for a while, to take some night shots of lights and traffic. It’s absolutely freezing here at the moment – real brass-monkeys weather. So off I went, armed with a camera and a cheap tripod (and a wooly hat) and took a few shots here and there around the place where I live.
When I came back and put the contents of the flashcard onto my computer I found that I had crazy lens flares alll over my shots and all the light sources had those star effects that you used to get in cheesy Top Of The Pops moments way back when. I suppose it must have something to do with taking a perfectly happy, warm camera out into the freezing british winter night without warning. Some of them don’t look too bad but others look like shots from a seventies travel brochure. Here’s an example. Click to make it larger…

Update – I’ve since learned that it was more to do with my aperture settings than some magic cold-pixie.

The site will be down for a couple of days due to a newsletter from a company called Freeservers. This was reported to Spamcop.net as a spam e-mail. Unfortunately the e-mail, included a mention of SXC, which resulted in the SXC host ISP almost getting blacklisted. The ISP then pulled the plug on SXC saying that they wouldn’t host the site anymore but Admin is negotiating with them and SXC should be up and running again in a day or two.

Fingers crossed.

I’ve bitten the bullet this week and got a cleaner. This makes me feel like a lazy bastard and like a fat bourgeois git. It also makes me feel like Waheyy! No more housework!!

Strangely, I’ve found myself tidying up the house in anticipation of her arrival, which strikes me as faintly ridiculous – like standing outside your house all night to deter burglars so that your guard dog doesn’t get scared. Maybe that’s it. Maybe the whole point of getting a cleaner isn’t so much so that they’ll clean your house but more so that you will get off your arse and clean it more.

Perhaps I should hire a full time mechanic to force me to look after my car better and a manicurist to stop me biting my nails. They wouldn’t actually have to do anything, just let me hire them. I’d do the rest.

What the hell is this poem? I remember reading it in a book years ago and it just stuck in my head. Don’t remember what the book was and I only remember a bit of the poem but it is driving me mad…

Scratched by a fall, with moans

As children of weak age

Lend life to dumb stones

Whereupon to vent their rage.

And bend their little fists,

And rate the senseless ground.

Any ideas anyone? There’s a Mars Bar in it for you :0)

Ninjai is the story of a young but incredibly powerful samurai. Animated with Flash it is an amazing piece of work, bloody and in parts profane it is definitely worth a look. Warning: You will need a big fat pipe to download the movies – there are nine so far and they run up to about 8-9MB a piece.